Monday, June 20, 2005

The Man's Guide to Parking Tickets

We've all been there. You park at a parking meter with the intention of coming back before the time runs out. Or better yet, the city has some crazy alternate side of the street parking rule where you can park for 2 hours on the "wrong" side of the street before getting hit with a ticket by The Man (not this Man, but "The" Man).



A disclaimer from The Man: This does NOT apply to handicap parking. People that park in handicap spots that aren't handicap should be shot. There, now you have an excuse to park in that spot.



A solution to the aforementioned ridiculous waste of effort and money is for cities to provide more free parking or more parking lots. You see, if they did they wouldn't have to hire meter maids to drive around all day trying to nail honest folks like The Man and this whole system wouldn't even exist.



While The Man can't condone not paying your parking tickets, here's a fact about them:



Most cities allow 6 or more unpaid parking tickets before suspending your license.



That means you can get 5, change your plate on your car, repeat as necessary. City databases aren't smart enough to link you by name, only by plate number. Some cities purge tickets as well, so after 10 years your unpaid tickets are removed from the system.



You do the math:



Cost of obtaining a new plate: $100.



Average cost of 5 parking tickets: $200.



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