Wednesday, October 18, 2006

Dear NFL Scheduling Department,

YOU SUCK for having so many teams on a bye week at once.

Signed,
The Man and everyone else that plays fantasy football

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Saturday, October 14, 2006

The Man is sad tonight

No, not because the powerful Michigan defense knocked Penn State's top 2 QBs out of the game, thus preventing a 3-0 weekend, but because of the disgrace that was the Miami/Florida International football game tonight.

First of all, the 'Canes should have stomped the FIU team by 100 points - you recruit the state's top talent and should be able to trounce one of ESPN's Bottom 10 teams without playing your starters.

Second, the after point ruckus that ensued is a black eye on the Miami program. Larry Coker should be fired and the players that participated in the stomping, helmet-hitting and punching should be thrown off the team. There is a difference between a street fight for your life and a regulated, officiated football game. The Man is sad tonight because regardless of the background of anyone on the field the bottom line is that it is a GAME.

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Tuesday, October 10, 2006

The Man's College Football Picks

Well, the Man only served up one game last weekend but it was a winner - the Pats covered the 9 point spread by 1.

Here are this week's college football picks:

Ohio State -14.5 at Michigan State: Drew Stanton challenged his team to come out and fight for their coach against Michigan - and they got drubbed, 31-13. MSU basketball stud Matt Trannon and RB Javon Ringer will be out, which means the OSU defense can shut down Stanton without fear of any other big play receivers or backs stepping up to beat them. The Man is buying a point to bring it under 14, taking OSU on the road -13.5.

Hawaii at Fresno State: What the hell has happened to the Bulldogs? Their once "play anyone, anytime, anywhere" mantra should be changed to "play patsies, at home, who can't throw". The 'Dogs have been outpassed in four games this year, with the only exception coming against barely D-I Utah State last week. Look for June Jones's high octane passing attack to soar against Fresno this week. Take the Rainbow Warrirors and buy a point and half to bring it to Hawaii -3.

Michigan -6 at Penn State: "Super" Mario Manningham will be out of this game, essentially taking away Michigan's big play capability. It's a night game in Happy Valley, so look for PSU to come up with a flukey big play or turnover to be the difference that keeps Penn State close. Take the Nittany Lions and buy a point - they won't win but should cover getting a touchdown.

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Friday, October 06, 2006

The Man does... product reviews?

That's right... The Man isn't dumb. He sees beer bloggers getting free booze and mom bloggers getting free food -- and he wants in! So The Man is going talk about one of the only things he knows... beer. But these aren't going to be your long, drawn out, takes 20 minutes to read reviews. These are The Man's product reviews.

The Man picked up a few new seasonal brews at his local grocer - Samuel Adams Octoberfest and a Pumpkin Ale, made by Buffalo Bill's Brewery in California.

Now you might be thinking, "Man, how the hell can you betray us? You normally drink lagers, pilsners and the occasional whiskey!"

True, but even The Man needs a break from beer butt. (Beer butt, adj.: a term that describes the state of your colon the morning after drinking cheap beer; also know as beer shits, beer ass, and the runs.) And The Man has figured out that spending a few extra bucks on a six pack means a few less trips to the can the next morning. Besides, both were on sale.

So here goes... first up: Samuel Adams Octoberfest

According to the label, Octoberfest started in 1810 when "a large festival was held in Munich, Germany to celebrate the wedding of the Crown Prince of Bavaria. The festival was repeated the next year and gave rise to the tradition of Oktoberfest."

But this comes from Jim Koch, a genius among beermeisters, because Sam Adams is actually brewed by Anheuser-Busch and Jim Koch markets it exclusively. Pretty genius if you ask The Man. But does The Man believe everything he reads? No. According to Wikipedia that sounds right... but Wikipedia isn't always right. So The Man went to another source: German Fun.org. And they concur, so The Man is a believer.

So how's the beer? Good. In fact, it doesn't have that caramel-y taste of a regular Sam Adams... it almost tastes like there are faint traces of spices in it - but in a good way. To be frank, it has a taste that captures the season of Fall in a bottle. Can you slam 12 of them like you could, say, a Coors Light? No. But it is a very good seasonal beer, nearly as perfect as Bell's Oberon is for Summer. The Man gives it 4.5 ball scratches out of a possibile 5.

Next up: Buffalo Bill's Brewery Pumpkin Ale

The Man saw this and thought "What the f*&k is this? Pumpkin in beer? You must be kidding." But then The Man walked by the "discount" rack and saw singles for .99 each and figured "What the hell, if it's that bad it'll just get pawned off on guests or will get pounded during one of The Man's late night drinking binges."

So The Man picked up a couple of these. And was really, really surprised. It was spicy. It tasted like pumpkins. And some small part of The Man felt like The Boy, reminiscing about door to door Halloween trick or treating, picking apples at the Cider Mill and hayrides. And The Man was happy.

Now if there's one thing The Man knows, it's a good thing when he sees it. But he also knows when there's too much of a good thing. This beer is the perfect gift to present a friend when they come over to watch the game - but don't plan on having more than a few... otherwise The Prophet within The Man forsees a miserable tomorrow full of trips to the can and a burning sensation back there.

The Man gives the Pumpkin Ale 4 ball scratches out of 5. Pick up this gem and some Octoberfest next time you head to the store - and you can thank The Man for it!

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The Man's NFL Lock of the Week

Miami +10 at New England. The Pats exploded last week at Cincy, scoring 38 points. Dante Culpepper has an injured shoulder and is questionable for Sunday, which means ex-Lion Joey "Blue Skies" Harrington will be forced to lead the team if the Pats D knocks Culpepper out. Did The Man mention that Miami is average a paultry 89 yards per game on the ground? Look for a weak Miami team to be annihilated by the Pats. The Man is buying a point to bring it to New England -9.

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